Teach Kids Initiative and Create More Calm with a Parenting Coach's Guidance

As a seasoned parenting coach, one of the most common themes I see in families is a desire for children to take more initiative—especially when it comes to contributing to the household. Parents often feel like they are the only ones noticing what needs to be done around the home, and they’re exhausted from constantly giving instructions and reminders. The good news is: this is a teachable skill, and it doesn’t have to take years to cultivate.

Parenting coaching is all about empowering families to create calm, connected homes where everyone pitches in and relationships flourish. When you work with a parent coach, the goal isn’t to impose a rigid system, but rather to co-create family rhythms that fit your values and your lifestyle. One powerful practice I teach in my parenting coaching sessions is training kids to see what needs to be done—and then take care of it.

Let’s talk about how this works in action.

Start with a Family Meeting

As a parent coach, I always encourage regular family meetings. These are dedicated times to connect as a team, talk about what’s working and what’s not, and make decisions together. To get kids involved in daily responsibilities, start by using a family meeting to work out what daily chores your kids will take on. You can brainstorm a list together of tasks that need to happen regularly—taking out the trash, setting the table, feeding pets, sweeping the kitchen floor, and so on.

One key strategy for getting buy-in is to present new chores as something to try temporarily. You might say, "Let’s each try our chosen task for the next two weeks. Then, we’ll check in at our next family meeting and see how it’s going. If something’s not working, we can switch or make adjustments." This gives kids agency while setting the expectation that their contributions matter and will be evaluated.

Chores Plus One: The Power of "Find One More Thing to Do"

Here’s where things get exciting. A favorite tool I use in parenting coaching is something I call “Chores Plus One.” Once daily responsibilities are established, we add one more element: "Find One More Thing to Do."

This is not a specific task assigned to the child. Instead, it’s a moment of mindfulness, an invitation for the child to look around and see something that could use their attention. This could be:

• Putting shoes by the front door back into the shoe bin

• Straightening couch pillows and folding a throw blanket

• Clearing dishes left on the coffee table

• Putting a sibling’s backpack by the stairs for them to take up

• Tossing recyclables into the correct bin

• Refilling the dog’s water bowl without being asked

It’s all about nurturing awareness. Kids are being asked to see their home not as a place that magically cleans itself or that only parents are responsible for, but as a shared space they can actively care for. In parenting coaching, we talk about this as developing a sense of ownership and contribution.

To support this habit, I suggest parents brainstorm with their kids a list of possible “plus one” chores. Keep it posted somewhere visible—on the fridge, a family bulletin board, or inside a kitchen cabinet. When kids are first learning, you might remind them gently: "What’s your plan for your plus one?"

The Long Game: Teaching Life Skills Through Parenting Coaching

This simple structure teaches so much more than cleaning up. It fosters initiative, mindfulness, responsibility, and pride in one’s environment. As a parenting coach, I remind families that the goal is not just to get the dishwasher loaded—it’s to raise capable, considerate humans who contribute without being asked.

Over time, children trained in this way begin to internalize what needs to be done. They start to act without prompting. And parents experience the joy of seeing their kids notice a mess and clean it up—or even more impressively, take care of a sibling’s needs just because they can.

Parent Coaching Can Help Make It Stick

If this feels overwhelming to start on your own, that’s exactly where parenting coaching can make all the difference. A parent coach helps break things down into manageable steps, provides accountability, and tailors strategies to your family’s unique dynamics.

You don’t have to keep repeating the same reminders day after day. You don’t have to feel like you’re the only one noticing what’s out of place. With a little structure and a lot of intention, your family can make the shift toward more shared responsibility and deeper connection.

Parenting doesn’t have to be a solo journey. Let’s work together to help your kids take initiative, and help you reclaim your energy and joy at home.

Want support implementing this system? Book a discovery call or learn more about my coaching packages at JoyfulParentingCoaching.com.